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  • I've met someone that makes me feel seasick
    Oh, what a skill to have, oh, what a skill to have
    So, many skills that make her distinctive
    But they're not mine to have, no, they're not mine

    Whenever she looks I read the nearest paper
    No, I don't care about the soaps
    No, I don't care about the soaps
    Though I'm acting like I'm in an EastEnders episode

    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director
    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director, please

    Carrots help us see much better in the dark
    Don't talk to girls, they'll break your heart
    And this is my head and this is my spout
    They work together, they can't figure anything out

    So, with the angst of a teenage band
    Here's another song about a gender I'll never understand
    Here's another song about a gender I'll never understand

    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director
    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director

    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director, please

    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget
    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget

    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget
    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget

    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget
    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget

    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget Jones
  • I've met someone that makes me feel seasick
    Oh, what a skill to have, oh, what a skill to have
    So, many skills that make her distinctive
    But they're not mine to have, no, they're not mine

    Whenever she looks I read the nearest paper
    No, I don't care about the soaps
    No, I don't care about the soaps
    Though I'm acting like I'm in an EastEnders episode

    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director
    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director, please

    Carrots help us see much better in the dark
    Don't talk to girls, they'll break your heart
    And this is my head and this is my spout
    They work together, they can't figure anything out

    So, with the angst of a teenage band
    Here's another song about a gender I'll never understand
    Here's another song about a gender I'll never understand

    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director
    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director

    If this is a rom-com
    Kill the director, please

    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget
    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget

    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget
    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget

    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget
    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget

    This is no Bridget Jones
    This is no Bridget, Bridget Jones