We are the pirates we don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything Well I've never been to Greenland, and I've never been to Denver And I've never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul And I've never been to Moscow, and I've never been to Tampa And I've never been to Boston in the fall 'Cause we are the pirates we don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything And I've never hoist the main sail, and I've never swabbed the poop deck And I've never veered starboard 'cause I've never sailed at all And I've never walked the gang plank, and I've never owned a parrot And I've never been to Boston in the fall 'Cause we are the pirates we don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything Oh, I've never plucked a rooster and I am not too good at ping-pong And I've never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall And I've never kissed a chipmunk, and I've never gotten head lice And I have never been to Boston in the fall Pirate captains log 2002 who'll be this band Relient K And why they'll be so full of contradictions We don't know what he did but we're down with Captain Kidd We don't wake up before lunch but we all eat Captain Crunch We don't smoke, we don't chew, we watch Captain Kangaroo {Ladies and gentlemen let's give them a big hand} We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything
We are the pirates we don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything Well I've never been to Greenland, and I've never been to Denver And I've never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul And I've never been to Moscow, and I've never been to Tampa And I've never been to Boston in the fall 'Cause we are the pirates we don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything And I've never hoist the main sail, and I've never swabbed the poop deck And I've never veered starboard 'cause I've never sailed at all And I've never walked the gang plank, and I've never owned a parrot And I've never been to Boston in the fall 'Cause we are the pirates we don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything Oh, I've never plucked a rooster and I am not too good at ping-pong And I've never thrown my mashed potatoes up against the wall And I've never kissed a chipmunk, and I've never gotten head lice And I have never been to Boston in the fall Pirate captains log 2002 who'll be this band Relient K And why they'll be so full of contradictions We don't know what he did but we're down with Captain Kidd We don't wake up before lunch but we all eat Captain Crunch We don't smoke, we don't chew, we watch Captain Kangaroo {Ladies and gentlemen let's give them a big hand} We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything We are the pirates who don't do anything We just stay at home and lie around And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything