[00:01.35]“He just was in so much pain
[00:03.21]That he, you know,
[00:04.57]took it out on his mom
[00:06.02]And took it out on his dad
[00:08.06]And took it out on his siblings
[00:11.02]But it’s almost like he didn’t—
[00:12.90]he didn’t feel worthy
[00:14.03]because he was rejected
[00:17.90]And I don’t know
[00:18.84]how anybody feels with
[00:20.06]having your whole family reject you”
[00:25.05]“He was searching for
[00:26.52] whatever made him feel like
[00:29.06] he wasn’t alone
[00:30.82]And that he wasn’t so different”
[00:33.34]“Well I know that
[00:34.63]some people will say that
[00:36.82] I treated him maternally,
[00:38.87]took care of him
[00:40.49]But I like to think that
[00:41.24] it was more I was trying to
[00:42.11]nurture him rather than take care of him
[00:44.28]Trying to nurture
[00:45.38] who he was and get him to
[00:47.41]let him do his art,
[00:48.01] let him do his music
[00:49.24]And encourage him
[00:49.99]to get better at it
[00:50.71] as opposed to trying to stifle him
[00:52.51]But also not
[00:53.43] trying to be the mom,
[00:54.41] but trying to be a nurturing
[00:55.65] girlfriend—or friend”
[00:59.18]“So who would support him?”
[01:00.61]“Me”
[01:02.87]“And what would he do all day
[01:05.01] while you were at work?”
[01:06.56]“It was kind of funny
[01:07.68]cause sometimes he would just sit there
[01:09.06]and watch TV for four hours
[01:09.79]And you’d think
[01:10.88] he wasn’t creating
[01:12.41]But he’d be playing guitar
[01:13.48] while he was doing that
[01:14.26] or think of stuff later and then,
[01:15.25]you know,
[01:15.76]and you go out for a few hours
[01:16.49] and you come back
[01:17.56]and there’s a painting on the wall
[01:18.64] or there’s a big comic strip—
[01:19.49]or whatever,
[01:20.02]he wrote a song,
[01:20.74]you know, recorded it.”
[01:54.91]“He hated being humiliated.
[01:56.13]He hated it.
[01:58.16]And if he ever thought
[01:59.30] he was humiliated,
[02:01.16]then you’d see the rage come out.
[02:03.95] And he was very careful about
[02:05.33] and stubborn about
[02:07.84] how the way the artwork was presented
[02:09.89] because he didn’t want to be humiliated.”
[02:13.20]
[02:13.62]“He’s home.
[02:15.57]And he comes downstairs in his little
[02:17.64]whitey tighties.
[02:18.12]No shirt. Barefoot.
[02:18.81]Up and in his undies.
[02:20.62]And uh—hairy dong coming out.
[02:21.42]That’s another thing
[02:25.41]I got sick of looking out.
[02:27.19] And he’s standing there with this tape
[02:28.37] in his hand and I go,
[02:29.42]‘What’s that?’
[02:29.84]And he goes,
[02:30.77]‘It’s the master cut to my new album.
[02:31.89]Can I put it on the stereo?’
[02:34.33]And I go,
[02:35.44]‘ Yeah! Turn it up. Up, up, up.’
[02:36.37]Cause I listen to music really loud.
[02:37.18]And I look at him and I go,
[02:40.68]‘Oh my god. Oh my god.’
[02:42.63] And I almost start crying.”
[02:44.88]
[03:51.05]“It just, every week it got worst.
[03:55.34]And sometimes he would come home,
[03:57.31] I think to hide.
[03:59.89] And it was really bad.
[04:01.48] He started getting sores and
[04:02.50]losing weight and nodding out.
[04:06.48] I was pretty sure he knew I knew.
[04:11.77]That I decided one time to
[04:12.79]just confront him.
[04:16.41]And I went up to his bedroom.
[04:18.92]He’s sitting on the side of the bed.
[04:20.98]And he was crying
[04:22.73]because I had just arrived.
[04:25.49]And he knew
[04:26.97] it was breaking my heart.
[04:28.90]That I—and I talked to him about it.
[04:32.37]And he burst into tears.
[04:33.54] And he was just ashamed."
[04:51.04]
[04:55.26]...end