[00:00.000] 作曲 : Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky
[00:00.00]Nutcracker -Straight No Chaser
[00:01.790]Hooray it's Christmas time
[00:04.760]But there's one lousy tradition
[00:09.670]There's a certain show that you will see
[00:11.880]That is all and many would agree
[00:14.640]It is time to find another show
[00:17.70]To substitute for the Nutcracker
[00:22.390]I'm watching the game but something's wrong
[00:25.900]Staring is my wife her face looks long
[00:29.490]I know that look it must be me
[00:31.430]It's not our anniversary
[00:32.640]I shrug no clue
[00:34.20]What did I do
[00:35.60]She stands in disbelief
[00:36.350]What
[00:36.810]This holiday scene brings no laughter
[00:40.490]Forced going to see the Nutcracker
[00:44.00]I try to block it from my mind
[00:45.810]Think fast what reason can I find
[00:47.670]Got work to do I'll fake the flu
[00:49.450]No chance I'm done I'm screwed
[00:50.810]I've seen the Nutcracker 20times
[00:54.850]Sure it is fun if you are four
[00:57.610]But don't call me a scrooge 'cause it's a bore
[01:02.10]The story's dated and that
[01:03.320]Masking thing freaks me out
[01:05.680]Well guess I'm a guy what can I say
[01:09.600]I'd rather watch football than ballet
[01:13.100]I tried my hardest not to groan
[01:14.970]And pulled the score up on my phone
[01:16.780]As I complained it's not the same
[01:18.610]We're rushing out the door
[01:20.400]All holiday shoppers on the road
[01:24.230]My holiday spirit might explode
[01:27.729]Of course there is no place to park
[01:29.719]We're late the theatres in the dark
[01:31.339]In no small feat we find the seat
[01:33.179]The shows about to start
[01:34.239]Here's that song from Tetris
[01:42.479]And I know it's the part
[01:44.529]When I fight not to fall asleep
[01:46.489]March the wooden
[01:49.309]Soldiers bunch of mice
[01:51.699]Start the fight land of sweets
[01:53.669]Man this stuff's trippy
[01:56.449]By the way this story makes no sense
[01:59.999]Still don't know what
[02:01.449]It means after all these years
[02:04.59]So confusing feel like snoozing
[02:08.679]Eyes are heavy as I start to dream
[02:14.138]Bolt wide awake must've fallen asleep
[02:15.288]Guess I didn't snore or make a peep
[02:17.288]'Cause my wife had no clue I had been out cold
[02:20.38]It's the finale coming up
[02:20.998]'Cause there is no beer left in my cup
[02:22.958]To make it through I'll need another drink
[02:24.798]Snuck out to the lobby oh look I found a TV
[02:28.898]I forgot the game was happening
[02:31.688]It's down to the wire time will soon expire
[02:34.918]Down by one this kick would win it
[02:37.578]Hut hut The ball snagged –oh no
[02:39.858]The kick's bad right right
[02:41.398]No We lost
[02:42.88]No How could this night get any worse
[02:43.818]Now I'm feeling all depressed
[02:45.28]But I still have to act impressed
[02:46.948]A pirouette oh wow that's great
[02:48.548]A six year old could do that too
[02:50.268]So my team lose at the bar
[02:51.638]Now dancing dudes in leotards
[02:52.838]Last Nutcracker hopefully
[02:55.768]But my wife's thinking differently
[02:58.508]She leans in closely whispers softly
[03:01.448]Can't wait for you to take me next year