[00:02.74]Yeah this just my life
[00:09.33]Front to back top to bottom
[00:14.77]Everything's changing around me
[00:19.08]These days don't feel the same
[00:22.50]We all lost faith and lost family
[00:25.60]Why must we play this game
[00:29.64]Lord have mercy on me
[00:33.02]I've been a sinning man
[00:37.27]Pull out my wings jump off the bridge and crash in a plane
[00:40.63]If I never land
[00:42.54]Know I never die
[00:49.04]We live forever in my mind
[00:56.24]And I sanctify
[01:03.52]We live forever still that life
[01:11.41]There's a lot going on but I stick to the ones I love
[01:14.69]I never claimed to be a perfect man but name a great man who was
[01:18.23]Consequences of my actions in the past years had me stressing out
[01:21.84]It was like may I just moved to l a
[01:24.19]I was tryna figure it out
[01:25.37]Medication for depression that I cut cold turkey had the kid manic
[01:28.96]In an episode out in hollywood wilding out like nick cannon
[01:32.49]Railing adderall pills out a dollar bill on the bathroom floor
[01:35.93]Clean the whole mess up with my nose
[01:37.75]What the ****** I need a vacuum for
[01:39.39]New york city on my birthday june 6 th 2014
[01:42.61]I had that first meeting with hov plus I brought out the whole team
[01:46.11]I drank that whole bottle of d'usse ty ty gave me that night
[01:49.63]When we left the club after rap genius house me
[01:52.37]And shorty got into a fight
[01:53.49]She came out the room swingin' hit me in the jaw
[01:55.56]I was really tryna fend her off
[01:57.40]But I ended up in the closet with my hands around her neck
[01:59.91]I was tripping dawg
[02:01.00]Too proud to apologize or empathize I blamed it all on her
[02:04.49]Saying that she hit me first even though she was the one hurt
[02:08.10]I was really just reflecting all the hurt
[02:09.96]That I was feeling from the band's rejection
[02:11.67]When kids these days split that ******t felt like a c-section
[02:15.22]And my infidelity and jealousy with natalie on top of the amphetamines
[02:18.50]And the ecstasy had me tryna drown face down in the chesapeake
[02:22.29]The next month I dropped down on my luck and had europe going nuts
[02:25.83]But I couldn't even appreciate it at the time I was going through too much
[02:29.28]Now I had to leverage million dollar label deals on the table for my records
[02:32.78]In ibiza eating paella on the roof tryna choose over breakfast
[02:36.61]Hov wasn't with the bidding war but I knew the roc just felt right
[02:39.81]When I saw kanye at wireless without t-pain still a good life
[02:43.35]Felt so close when mr hudson introduced me to him backstage
[02:47.07]He prolly don't even remember that ******t like a ****** off backpage
[02:50.66]But at that stage
[02:51.44]I was ready to swing for the fence like a batting cage
[02:54.07]At the same time I was winding down a low point in my addict phase
[02:57.55]The adderall started wearing off and I went into a deep writer's block
[03:01.18]All over a song that I couldn't finish
[03:03.17]That I wrote about signin' to the roc
[03:04.92]Isn't that ironic I was feeling so psychotic
[03:07.95]With the whole world excited for me and my idol saying I got it
[03:11.51]******t got bad out in l a
[03:12.73]So I moved back home to my mom's ba******t
[03:15.05]Linked up with smoko and papi beatz and took it back to basics
[03:18.89]Then I wrote rage that was me screaming out through the pain
[03:22.46]And u mad addressing my relation******p with natalie it was too bad
[03:25.83]The violence and the lies slipped suicide into my mental health
[03:29.38]I did acid in the studio one day and almost killed myself
[03:33.09]As I started to fall apart certain stars started to align
[03:36.48]Oh mys came to chicago in january at the perfect time
[03:40.02]He said kanye was working on an album
[03:42.07]And uzi played him one of our songs
[03:43.72]He was tryna fly me out ****** it was goin' down like the dow jones
[03:47.18]Pulled up to westlake first day I was there I recorded wolves
[03:50.80]I knew I was the one like neo meeting with the oracle
[03:54.50]But I had to get a handle 'fore the door was pulled
[03:56.61]Crawled out on snl
[03:58.32]All the ******s hating on me back home lookin' at me like fml
[04:02.06]A lot of people coming out the wood like let's work tryna network
[04:05.34]All the pressure making my head hurt the molly wouldn't let the meds work
[04:08.81]At this time it's like feb 1 st to the 15 th
[04:10.70]And I'm still addicted
[04:12.65]Frustrated writing ******t for ye tryna visualize someone else's vision
[04:16.19]Then he laid that verse on u mad and we made the ******t the single
[04:19.73]Ye and hov getting into it over me tryna do a joint venture
[04:23.20]And good music still fam but it's that roc boy savemoney life
[04:26.64]Took the bus out on the road for the traffic tour did a hundred nights
[04:30.10]Cleaned out my closet I got rid of all of my demons
[04:33.38]If you learn one thing from my journey ****** it's don't stop believing
[04:37.02]When this ******t got so suffocating I could barely even keep breathing
[04:40.64]Wrote my wrongs all in this song now
[04:42.49]I'd like to welcome y'all to my season
[04:44.18]****** I'm gone
[04:58.89]Know I never die
[05:05.06]We live forever in my mind
[05:12.64]And I sanctify
[05:19.12]We live forever still that life